So I’m on a ‘date’ with a boy in McDonalds, trying our hardest to look like a straight couple whilst both being gay, (lesbian for me) because we’re 13 and don’t want to be bullied. Then he gets the order number 69 and starts making uncomfortable cringe jokes, before he leaves me to order my food while he holds a table for us. So I go to order my food just as the server changes and I’m like ‘okay this is fine, you’re okay, it’s just ordering food and you practised your order in the car’ and then bam I’m greeted by the most gorgeous face and body and I-can-not-function. To make matters worse she looks at my Sherlock shirt and says, “that’s a nice shirt” so I’m getting hella clustered over nothing and she’s so goddamn oblivious to how gay I am and how beautiful she is. But eventually I manage to order, even if with stuttering and internal screaming. So she makes me my order and I take it, but as I’m walking to the table with my ‘date’ sat at I turn to look at her, and trip over A FREAKING HAT! THERE WAS A HAT ON THE FLOOR IN THE MIDDLE OF MCDONALDS!?!?!? So my drink goes flying, coke splashing down my shirt, trousers, shoes and all over the floor. And you know my ‘date’? He just starts laughing really loudly! He doesn’t even help me! And guess who comes to help me....tHe CuTe GiRl! So let’s just say there was a lot of embarrassment, I didn’t date that boy for much longer, and I definitely did not get the girl.
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